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  • Writer's pictureMetin Tiryaki

Raising a Child Through a Father's Perspective

Having a child is one of the most amazing things that can happen to a person in life. Of course, it has many challenges as well as it's amazing.

The paternity process begins with the "I'm pregnant" news you will hear from your spouse. You know, there is a famous scene in the movies, the man holds the woman's hand, while the couple hears the baby's first heartbeat through the ultrasound device, a drop of tear appears in the woman's eye, and an emotional smile on the man's face, that scene really happens.

The famous "9 Months and 10 Days" process is actually your most comfortable period as a father, enjoy it. During this period your partner is constantly gaining weight but still very beautiful, you need to remind her often; because women become overly emotional during pregnancy, after giving birth be ready for the “Postpartum depression”.

When you see your baby for the first time, you feel strange, the moment you have been waiting for months has finally arrived, but as you look at your baby, you think, "Why am I not going crazy with joy?" the question is stuck in your mind. Don't feel bad right away, this feeling goes away the first time you touch your baby. The moment you hold your baby in your arms, close your eyes and breathe in the scent of the baby for the first time, that will probably be one of the most amazing moments of your life, keep it long.

The first weeks are tough, you will encounter many things that you have never experienced before. The baby becomes jaundiced, loses weight in the first week, cries constantly, you are sleep deprived, you panic. Generally, during this period, Grandmothers become lifeguards. As a father, you cannot contribute to his nutrition in the beginning because the baby drinks only breast milk for the first 6 months. If you are an involved father, you can help with bathing, changing diapers, and putting them to sleep.

Holding and cuddling your baby is a great feeling, but if you get them used to it, you may find yourself standing all night walking for hours trying to put them to sleep; Singing a lullaby really works, if you have a terrible voice like me, humming is good too. Especially the "Long live Fenerbahçe anthem"... (Tried :)

After starting to walk, it is necessary to be very careful, as he will poke everywhere and put everything in his mouth; you can easily find them trying to insert pretzels into an electrical outlet. God forbid, but you have to be careful too. The 2-year-old syndrome, which is called "Dirty 2", is really one of the most difficult periods (I thought they called it "Dirty" because they always shit themselves :). They are constantly in a state of stubbornness, when they do not get what they want, they throw themselves from the ground. During this period, you need to be very patient, if you are not, go on a long journey, and return when the child is 3 years old :)

You should be very careful about toys. One of the biggest mistakes to be made while raising a child is to buyeverything the child wants; do not make this mistake! Buying too many toys for a child can cause him to become dissatisfied, have trouble focusing, and get bored very quickly with everything (I did it, I know from there). When you buy a toy every day, you think that you make him happy, but you will realize that you have made a big mistake, and then you will probably be alone with a spoiled child. (Children today are also strange, their psychology deteriorates at a very early age, in our time, if our father beats us, our psychology would immediately improve :). Of course, I am not against psychologists, but I think there is no need to get them ultra rich

It is also necessary to establish a good balance between television and computer. Do not allow them to watch too much television (especially violence, gore), limit the phone and tablet hours as well. In fact, the best thing is for the child to be with his friends, to spend time outside; but today, if you don't live in a secure neighbourhood or site in big cities, it is really unsettling to let children out on the street.

A difficult period awaits you when you start primary school, the child may have difficulties and boredom while learning new things, he can find all kinds of excuses not to go to school, at this point it is necessary to be determined. It is also important that the mother and father speak the same language and be consistent with the child. If one of the parents behaves differently, the child can easily start using it to his advantage.

Showing love to your child is very important, but he must also feel that you have authority. In other words, you should not exaggerate the topic of “being friends with the child” being discussed today, your child already has many friends and will have them in the future; but remember there is only one Mum and Dad.


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